13throwcenter
01-21-2001, 11:45 AM
Yes, some of you will recognize this because I stole it from the Rockfords board /images/smile.gif
THINGS I WISH I'D KNOWN BEFORE I WENT OUT IN THE REAL WORLD
1. Any and all compliments can be handled by simply saying "Why, thank you"
(though it helps if you say it with a Southern accent).
2. Some people are working backstage, some are playing in the orchestra,
some are on stage singing, some are in the audience as critics and some are
there to applaud. Know who and where you are.
3. Never give yourself a haircut after three margaritas.
4. When baking, follow directions. When cooking, go by your own taste.
5. Never continue dating anyone who is rude to the waiter and doesn't like
dogs/cats.
6. Good sex should involve laughter. Because think about it, it is funny.
7. You need only two tools. WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and it
should, use WD-40. If it moves and shouldn't, use the tape.
8. The five most essential words for a healthy, vital relationship: "I
apologize" and "You are right".
9. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
10. When you make a mistake, make amends immediately. It's easier to eat
crow while it's still warm.
11. The only really good advice that I remember my mother ever gave me was
"Go! You might meet somebody!"
12. If he/she says that you are too good for him/her--believe it.
13. I've learned to pick my battles; I ask myself, Will this matter one
year from now? How about one month? One week? One day?
14. Never pass up an opportunity to pee.
15. If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You have another chance!
16. Living well really is the best revenge. Being miserable because of a
bad or former relationship just might mean that the other person was right
about you.
17. Knowing how to listen to music is as great a talent as knowing how to
make it.
18. Work is good but it's not that important.
19. Never underestimate the kindness of your fellow man.
20. And finally... Be really nice to your friends. You never know when you
are going to need them to empty your bedpan.
#2: very good, know your role in life! I am a backstage worker :)
#4: absolutely, just ask Phil
#5: I dated a guy who hated cats and boy did he end up being a real CREEP. >:|
#9: SO TRUE :) I'm convinced there is no such thing as NORMAL!
#14: never EVER pass up an opportunity to pee
THINGS I WISH I'D KNOWN BEFORE I WENT OUT IN THE REAL WORLD
1. Any and all compliments can be handled by simply saying "Why, thank you"
(though it helps if you say it with a Southern accent).
2. Some people are working backstage, some are playing in the orchestra,
some are on stage singing, some are in the audience as critics and some are
there to applaud. Know who and where you are.
3. Never give yourself a haircut after three margaritas.
4. When baking, follow directions. When cooking, go by your own taste.
5. Never continue dating anyone who is rude to the waiter and doesn't like
dogs/cats.
6. Good sex should involve laughter. Because think about it, it is funny.
7. You need only two tools. WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and it
should, use WD-40. If it moves and shouldn't, use the tape.
8. The five most essential words for a healthy, vital relationship: "I
apologize" and "You are right".
9. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
10. When you make a mistake, make amends immediately. It's easier to eat
crow while it's still warm.
11. The only really good advice that I remember my mother ever gave me was
"Go! You might meet somebody!"
12. If he/she says that you are too good for him/her--believe it.
13. I've learned to pick my battles; I ask myself, Will this matter one
year from now? How about one month? One week? One day?
14. Never pass up an opportunity to pee.
15. If you woke up breathing, congratulations! You have another chance!
16. Living well really is the best revenge. Being miserable because of a
bad or former relationship just might mean that the other person was right
about you.
17. Knowing how to listen to music is as great a talent as knowing how to
make it.
18. Work is good but it's not that important.
19. Never underestimate the kindness of your fellow man.
20. And finally... Be really nice to your friends. You never know when you
are going to need them to empty your bedpan.
#2: very good, know your role in life! I am a backstage worker :)
#4: absolutely, just ask Phil
#5: I dated a guy who hated cats and boy did he end up being a real CREEP. >:|
#9: SO TRUE :) I'm convinced there is no such thing as NORMAL!
#14: never EVER pass up an opportunity to pee