brokenarrow
12-23-2000, 03:49 AM
(get something to drink........this is long, and HAVE fun you crazy kids!)
::::::::::::::::::::::The Scene:::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Ed and L'il Timmy are sitting in the living room, sipping a little nog...specs' on, reading their favorite books. Edward is sitting in his comfy armchair, while Timmy is sitting in the beautiful chair Matt bought for him at Toys-R-Us....genuIne plastic/resin..with a cool decal of Charizord....Timmy's ultimate Pokemon..."If I cood onlee be a traner" he thinks.....
The fire is roaring in the fireplace, a couple of candles are burning.....Ed's feeling good, it's his Birthday afterall and he feels in his heart.....
"There will be a PARTY today!"
L'il Tim is reading one of his favorites....."The Polar Express" by Chris Van Allsburg....Ed is reading "Player Piano" by Kurt Vonegut........pssssssstttttt....whisper......Litt le does Timmy know, but Ed is ACTUALLY reading "Lucky" by Jackie Collins....he has it neatly tucked in the center of the Vonegut........... ;-)
The phone rings.....Ed gets up quickly.....L'il Tim peaks out over the upper ridge of his book, eyeing him over the top of his specs and follows Ed with his eyes leaving the living room......(Ed didn't notice the sheepish grin on the little puppet man's face...)
What seemed like a short moment.....nay......only mere seconds.....Ed returns to the living room and plops down in his seat and lets out a big *sigh~~~~
"Who wuz that on the fone edde?" Tim asks....
"Hmmm? Oh.....that was broken>" responds Ed looking quite despondent.
::Tim: "How is she? Wut did she wannt?"
::ed: "She wished me a happy birthday."
::Tim: "Oooo...How is she triking u todaay? Wut duz she need ficksed?"
::ed: "Nothing Tim....she said she is going to be busier than hell today, and since she'll have no time just wanted to wish me a Happy Birthday...she'll be too busy to call later on."
::Tim: "That's it? No trix? U look sad edde...R U ok?"
::ed: "Ummm...yeah L'il man....I'm ok... :-(
(..............everyone let out a giant Awwwwww here.......)
::Tim: "She must stil be annoied at U."
::ed: "Annoyed at me????? Why? What did I do to make broken> annoyed???"
::Tim: "I shoodn't say....U will be mad at mee..."
::ed: "I could never be mad at you Tim.....Please, tell me?
::Tim: "Well, ok....if u promiss...but dont tell her I told..............then sheel be mad at mee....."
::ed: "I won't tell on you Timmy.....Scouts honor!"
::Tim: "she sez you have a problum with yerrears..."
::ed: "I have a problem with my REARS?????????? **~baffled=perplexed~~~~~"
::Tim: "No silleee.....Your EARS......"
::ed: "How do I POSSIBLy have a problem with my EARS!"
::Tim: "Brokenarro sez that U do not know how to kleen them...yur ears I mean....she sez U shood onlee kleen the owter ear...but you jam the q-tip in, spin it arownd...like Ur digging for gold....then she sez thats bad enuff...but then you look at the swab for a reely long time to examin it...the ear wacks...then she sez U say..."I'm LOOKIN' FOR GOLD IN THEM THAR HILLS....." reely reely lowd....."
ed: "I DO NOT SAY THAT.......I DON'T EVEN DO THAT! I KNOW YOU'RE ONLY SUPPOSED TO CLEAN THE OUTER EAR....."SWAB IT LIGHTLY, NEVER PLACING THE SWAB IN THE INNER EAR..." It says so on the box Timmy!"
Tim: "That's not all she sez abowt U.....she sed that U do not No how to go thru a toll booth eether.....she sez that U see a flank of toll booths....and U start digging arownd in Ur pokits for change...U cannot go thru the booth with the toll booth lady or man....U want to make the baskit.....U sweerv all over the road diggin' for coinz....U get to the baskit....ame.....and then U MISS evry time.......then U have to get owt of the car to look for the coin.....one time U even got under the car......Ur a bad ame......and cood never go to the toll booth lady or man....just like a man not asking for direKtions......this annoys her.......so thats Y she's probibly not having a party this yeer........"
;-)
ed: "I'M APPALLED! I CAN'T BELIEVE SHE SAID THIS TO YOU.....TIMMY! DON'T BELIEVE A WORD OF IT....SHE'S JUST STARTING TROUBLE AGAIN!!!"
Tim: "O...I do not beleeve her edde.....butt I don't know abowt all of thoze othur peeple she told......"
ed: "What OTHER PEOPLE?????.......HOW MANY PEOPLE HAS SHE TOLD THIS TOO..............I'M SO HUMILIATED, I CAN'T EVEN FUNCTION............I MIGHT EVEN MAKE A 'LIST' I'M SO DISTRAUGHT....................................
Tim: "Shees told evereeone.........absolewtly EVEREEONE...
U know how peeple even hold us wen weer babees...and we dont No thos peeple? ... shee even told THEM......Evereeone thaat haz ever nown U edde....she even CALLED peete and ralf.........."
ed: "THAT'S IT! I'VE HEARD ENOUGH........GET YOU'RE COAT ON L'IL TIM......WE HAVE A HOUSE CALL TO MAKE.......
....~~~~grumble*****grrrrrr~~~~~~~~~~~~I'm gonna give her a piece of my mind........tellin' people I can't clean my ears.....can't go through toll booths...........calling everyone on the planet.........and ANOTHER thing Timmy.... something that really BURNS my butt about her.........she's always telling everyone about how HIDEOUS my random repairman butt crack is........I mean.......SHIT......one time it happens to peak out...ONE FRIGGIN' TIME..and there she is.........TELLING EVERYONE ON THE PLANET AGAIN! Hurry, we need to catch her before she leaves...."OOOoo I'm so BUSY, WAhhhhh...I have NO TIME.....I MISS everyone......" I don't buy it Timmy....... Let's go!"
The two hustle out of the door making their way to the car......There was ONE thing our dear Ed didn't notice after he strapped our Hero, L'il Timmy into his Fisher Price car seat.....was another liiiitle sheeeepish grin from our L'il Puppet man thing......
"it worked!" he thought! heh....heh......
::::::::::::::::::::::The Scene:::::::::::::::::::::::::::
Ed and L'il Timmy are sitting in the living room, sipping a little nog...specs' on, reading their favorite books. Edward is sitting in his comfy armchair, while Timmy is sitting in the beautiful chair Matt bought for him at Toys-R-Us....genuIne plastic/resin..with a cool decal of Charizord....Timmy's ultimate Pokemon..."If I cood onlee be a traner" he thinks.....
The fire is roaring in the fireplace, a couple of candles are burning.....Ed's feeling good, it's his Birthday afterall and he feels in his heart.....
"There will be a PARTY today!"
L'il Tim is reading one of his favorites....."The Polar Express" by Chris Van Allsburg....Ed is reading "Player Piano" by Kurt Vonegut........pssssssstttttt....whisper......Litt le does Timmy know, but Ed is ACTUALLY reading "Lucky" by Jackie Collins....he has it neatly tucked in the center of the Vonegut........... ;-)
The phone rings.....Ed gets up quickly.....L'il Tim peaks out over the upper ridge of his book, eyeing him over the top of his specs and follows Ed with his eyes leaving the living room......(Ed didn't notice the sheepish grin on the little puppet man's face...)
What seemed like a short moment.....nay......only mere seconds.....Ed returns to the living room and plops down in his seat and lets out a big *sigh~~~~
"Who wuz that on the fone edde?" Tim asks....
"Hmmm? Oh.....that was broken>" responds Ed looking quite despondent.
::Tim: "How is she? Wut did she wannt?"
::ed: "She wished me a happy birthday."
::Tim: "Oooo...How is she triking u todaay? Wut duz she need ficksed?"
::ed: "Nothing Tim....she said she is going to be busier than hell today, and since she'll have no time just wanted to wish me a Happy Birthday...she'll be too busy to call later on."
::Tim: "That's it? No trix? U look sad edde...R U ok?"
::ed: "Ummm...yeah L'il man....I'm ok... :-(
(..............everyone let out a giant Awwwwww here.......)
::Tim: "She must stil be annoied at U."
::ed: "Annoyed at me????? Why? What did I do to make broken> annoyed???"
::Tim: "I shoodn't say....U will be mad at mee..."
::ed: "I could never be mad at you Tim.....Please, tell me?
::Tim: "Well, ok....if u promiss...but dont tell her I told..............then sheel be mad at mee....."
::ed: "I won't tell on you Timmy.....Scouts honor!"
::Tim: "she sez you have a problum with yerrears..."
::ed: "I have a problem with my REARS?????????? **~baffled=perplexed~~~~~"
::Tim: "No silleee.....Your EARS......"
::ed: "How do I POSSIBLy have a problem with my EARS!"
::Tim: "Brokenarro sez that U do not know how to kleen them...yur ears I mean....she sez U shood onlee kleen the owter ear...but you jam the q-tip in, spin it arownd...like Ur digging for gold....then she sez thats bad enuff...but then you look at the swab for a reely long time to examin it...the ear wacks...then she sez U say..."I'm LOOKIN' FOR GOLD IN THEM THAR HILLS....." reely reely lowd....."
ed: "I DO NOT SAY THAT.......I DON'T EVEN DO THAT! I KNOW YOU'RE ONLY SUPPOSED TO CLEAN THE OUTER EAR....."SWAB IT LIGHTLY, NEVER PLACING THE SWAB IN THE INNER EAR..." It says so on the box Timmy!"
Tim: "That's not all she sez abowt U.....she sed that U do not No how to go thru a toll booth eether.....she sez that U see a flank of toll booths....and U start digging arownd in Ur pokits for change...U cannot go thru the booth with the toll booth lady or man....U want to make the baskit.....U sweerv all over the road diggin' for coinz....U get to the baskit....ame.....and then U MISS evry time.......then U have to get owt of the car to look for the coin.....one time U even got under the car......Ur a bad ame......and cood never go to the toll booth lady or man....just like a man not asking for direKtions......this annoys her.......so thats Y she's probibly not having a party this yeer........"
;-)
ed: "I'M APPALLED! I CAN'T BELIEVE SHE SAID THIS TO YOU.....TIMMY! DON'T BELIEVE A WORD OF IT....SHE'S JUST STARTING TROUBLE AGAIN!!!"
Tim: "O...I do not beleeve her edde.....butt I don't know abowt all of thoze othur peeple she told......"
ed: "What OTHER PEOPLE?????.......HOW MANY PEOPLE HAS SHE TOLD THIS TOO..............I'M SO HUMILIATED, I CAN'T EVEN FUNCTION............I MIGHT EVEN MAKE A 'LIST' I'M SO DISTRAUGHT....................................
Tim: "Shees told evereeone.........absolewtly EVEREEONE...
U know how peeple even hold us wen weer babees...and we dont No thos peeple? ... shee even told THEM......Evereeone thaat haz ever nown U edde....she even CALLED peete and ralf.........."
ed: "THAT'S IT! I'VE HEARD ENOUGH........GET YOU'RE COAT ON L'IL TIM......WE HAVE A HOUSE CALL TO MAKE.......
....~~~~grumble*****grrrrrr~~~~~~~~~~~~I'm gonna give her a piece of my mind........tellin' people I can't clean my ears.....can't go through toll booths...........calling everyone on the planet.........and ANOTHER thing Timmy.... something that really BURNS my butt about her.........she's always telling everyone about how HIDEOUS my random repairman butt crack is........I mean.......SHIT......one time it happens to peak out...ONE FRIGGIN' TIME..and there she is.........TELLING EVERYONE ON THE PLANET AGAIN! Hurry, we need to catch her before she leaves...."OOOoo I'm so BUSY, WAhhhhh...I have NO TIME.....I MISS everyone......" I don't buy it Timmy....... Let's go!"
The two hustle out of the door making their way to the car......There was ONE thing our dear Ed didn't notice after he strapped our Hero, L'il Timmy into his Fisher Price car seat.....was another liiiitle sheeeepish grin from our L'il Puppet man thing......
"it worked!" he thought! heh....heh......