meaningless
03-19-2001, 12:01 PM
Ha... When I was typing that subject, I mis-typed at first and almost wrote 7 tears ago, which would maybe be a good title, as well.
Anyway, in theory I would wait to make this post til Saturday, but I can't.
So here it is:
March 24, 1994- The best day of my life? First time I saw Pearl Jam live. It was general admission and I was up pretty close... It was incredible. I remember almost getting trampled during the yet-to-be-released "Whipping"... I mean my feet were not on the ground and my body was about to be... it was frightening. I remember Eddie climbing onto a speaker thing or something and I could see his monkeywrench tattoo... They were so close, I could almost taste them. I experienced so many emotions during that show. I would love to go back to that day, those feeling, those moments.
Actually perhaps I should have started this on Feb 14, 1994. On that day I received my first ten club newsletter, i think... Maybe it was my 2nd. And also a phone call from a friend telling me PJ was coming to my town in March... Then I found out tix had already sold out that weekend... Okay so that was real crushing... I mean, imagine receiving your first newsletter and that amazing news, and then being flattened with a mallet like that? So I spent the next month trying to find a scalped ticket... I think I ended up spending nearly $100 for a ticket. Fucking scalpers.
April 3, 1994- Listening to/recording the Atlanta show off the radio... That was sooo fucking cool and unprecedented. Not to mention... well fuck, who could ask for anything better from their intensely favorite band/entity/thing/etc in the world... I mean two weeks after my concert, I got this incredible flashback of the experience, that I could own forever, too. I was totally reliving March 24th, you know? 'Course, who would have known that six years later the same band would release "official bootlegs" of all their shows from their tour that year, a dvd, a odds n' sods collection... etc. :)
April 8, 1994- Found out about Kurt. Life has never been the same since. Unfortunately, the entire year of 1994 was to be filled with weird juxtapositions of joy and sadness... there was all the cool pearl jam events, but then there was Kurt's death, and in August, this 15 year old guy I knew (i was 14...) died suddenly and unexplainedly... It is a long story but I was on this sort of retreat type thing... hard to explain... anyway with 19 or 20 other kids from my hometown, but we were in Cleveland, OH, and he was on the trip too... My friend and I were the only two girls there... Everyone was in a different location but htey rounded us up and we were all in this room being fed sandwiches and cokes... Someone came to tell us what happened and it was this room full of guys, all crying... It was well.. alot of things. So it was just really... And he was my cousin's best friend... And my cousin didn't have many friends and was kind of the butt of alot of people's jokes because he has a learning disability and maybe didn't come off as "smart" as they wanted... I don't know, people are fucked up. I havent' been the same since then, either.
April 14, 1994- PJ on SNL... Eddie paying tribute to Kurt with "Hey Hey, My My" and the letter "K." on his shirt... poignant, very heart-wrenching... And PJ playing three! songs... A new one, too... (Not For You). Rollercoastering...
Anyway...
I think beginning in 1995 was when I fell into depression... sort of spiralled downwards, then kind of just spun in circles, spiralling downwards at warp speeds nowadays, but that's beside the point, right?
-N
"if just once... i could feel love... oh stare back at me, yeah..."
Anyway, in theory I would wait to make this post til Saturday, but I can't.
So here it is:
March 24, 1994- The best day of my life? First time I saw Pearl Jam live. It was general admission and I was up pretty close... It was incredible. I remember almost getting trampled during the yet-to-be-released "Whipping"... I mean my feet were not on the ground and my body was about to be... it was frightening. I remember Eddie climbing onto a speaker thing or something and I could see his monkeywrench tattoo... They were so close, I could almost taste them. I experienced so many emotions during that show. I would love to go back to that day, those feeling, those moments.
Actually perhaps I should have started this on Feb 14, 1994. On that day I received my first ten club newsletter, i think... Maybe it was my 2nd. And also a phone call from a friend telling me PJ was coming to my town in March... Then I found out tix had already sold out that weekend... Okay so that was real crushing... I mean, imagine receiving your first newsletter and that amazing news, and then being flattened with a mallet like that? So I spent the next month trying to find a scalped ticket... I think I ended up spending nearly $100 for a ticket. Fucking scalpers.
April 3, 1994- Listening to/recording the Atlanta show off the radio... That was sooo fucking cool and unprecedented. Not to mention... well fuck, who could ask for anything better from their intensely favorite band/entity/thing/etc in the world... I mean two weeks after my concert, I got this incredible flashback of the experience, that I could own forever, too. I was totally reliving March 24th, you know? 'Course, who would have known that six years later the same band would release "official bootlegs" of all their shows from their tour that year, a dvd, a odds n' sods collection... etc. :)
April 8, 1994- Found out about Kurt. Life has never been the same since. Unfortunately, the entire year of 1994 was to be filled with weird juxtapositions of joy and sadness... there was all the cool pearl jam events, but then there was Kurt's death, and in August, this 15 year old guy I knew (i was 14...) died suddenly and unexplainedly... It is a long story but I was on this sort of retreat type thing... hard to explain... anyway with 19 or 20 other kids from my hometown, but we were in Cleveland, OH, and he was on the trip too... My friend and I were the only two girls there... Everyone was in a different location but htey rounded us up and we were all in this room being fed sandwiches and cokes... Someone came to tell us what happened and it was this room full of guys, all crying... It was well.. alot of things. So it was just really... And he was my cousin's best friend... And my cousin didn't have many friends and was kind of the butt of alot of people's jokes because he has a learning disability and maybe didn't come off as "smart" as they wanted... I don't know, people are fucked up. I havent' been the same since then, either.
April 14, 1994- PJ on SNL... Eddie paying tribute to Kurt with "Hey Hey, My My" and the letter "K." on his shirt... poignant, very heart-wrenching... And PJ playing three! songs... A new one, too... (Not For You). Rollercoastering...
Anyway...
I think beginning in 1995 was when I fell into depression... sort of spiralled downwards, then kind of just spun in circles, spiralling downwards at warp speeds nowadays, but that's beside the point, right?
-N
"if just once... i could feel love... oh stare back at me, yeah..."