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Immortal
12-01-2003, 02:22 AM
i guess this is like a song. envision it that way, at least. maybe someone will like it. haven't done this in a while here, hope maybe there's still room for it.


"whoever you are with"
11:05pm
imagination setting in and i've nowhere to be
there's room on the bus for him and her and you, but none for me
the seats are small, room enough
for a certain number of pairs
but thoughts add up to be meaningless
when numbers fill the air
and i was 10, you were eleven
the morning mist in our lungs
took us by surprise, i could see in your eyes
the look i'd come to love.
minds made up, can't wait to go
we're starting our love affair
in six months more, you're on the east coast
and me, i'm still standing there
at the airport, the car's outside
warming to the tepid air
but my tears run colder than that january day
to which none other could compare
and i was eighteen, you were younger
by a few months, maybe a year
i've got a picture that looks nothing like you
a document i've learned to love.
as with every step of life, we'll learn to grow apart
whoever you are with, they've not been with you from the start
11:10pm

zds

peacefulness
12-01-2003, 02:22 PM
amazing

~Melanie

jamijams
12-01-2003, 02:42 PM
zach, there is always room here for your (and everyone's) work.

excellent

Highway23
12-01-2003, 10:46 PM
I miss reading your stuff man


this ...is great :)

reallygroovN
12-02-2003, 06:05 PM
thats just really beautiful

thanks :D

Not_Trapped
12-02-2003, 06:19 PM
yeah i like this - a lot -

dominic

Johnny Carwash
12-02-2003, 08:01 PM
i feel like a pupil in a school where you remind me that i'm a fool who'd dare to compete with such flows and diagrams of broken homes, broken feelings, and broken hearts all added up with broken thoughts now abandoned below a steeple, and adjectives could never equal...


thanks zach

of_the_girl
12-02-2003, 09:56 PM
my first impression of you was this... and it is absolutely beautiful.

thanks for sharing :)

PJ Lovin',
Jessie